My Mighty Fortress

Ok before you read this you MUST listen to this song:

A Mighty Fortress

This song inspired this post. Like, ok continuing from last night's post things have been crazy these past few days but I listen to this song and I remember why I love my life :)

The lyrics of this song are just absolutely mind blowing! God's kingdom IS unshakable!! I am part of that kingdom therefore my faith should be unshakable too. Like Christ is sitting on the throne holding my heart in his hands and there is nothing that will bring him down from that throne, there is nothing that will keep Christ from my heart and my love. NOTHING!! My faith HAS to be unshakable, it has to be strong. When things get hard I will go to God.

Our God is a consuming fire
A burning holy flame, with glory and freedom
Our God is the only righteous judge,
Ruling over us with kindness and wisdom

Wow...that really gets to me. Like if there was any song that I would dedicate to God it would be this one because it reminds me of who holds my life. He is glorious and loving and he's passionate about ME! God is crazy about me!! He loves me more than I can possibly comprehend. He is the only judge, and he rules but he is a kind and loving ruler, and the best part about him is that he is wise, he knows exactly what he's doing! There's no such thing as "I made a mistake" in God's power.

God loves us and fights for us. Christ died for us. Is it just me or is this crazy?? Like the person who created EVERYTHING is fighting for me and is willing to let his only son die in my place so that I can have life ETERNALLY!! Yeah my God is jealous for me, he wants me to love him just like he loves me, can you blame him for that? Don't you want people that you love to love you back? He calls me his bride, if I was getting married I would want my groom to love me too! GOD LOVES YOU! HE LOVES YOU SO STINKING MUCH!!!

Yeah God is a mighty fortress and he is MY mighty fortress. I will take refuge in him during any storm because he is the only refuge I didn't create, the only refuge that will not fail. Sometimes as humans we take refuge in the people around us, friends, family, lovers, and that's not a bad thing, but these are imperfect fortresses because humans are imperfect and we are bound to fail. God is the only perfect refuge! You can still go to the people around you but don't ever put them above God, go to God first! Always always always seek him first, seek his fortress above anyone else' and he will place the right people around you to keep you strong.

My heart is set on him, my eyes are fixed on him and although it is hard sometimes I will not stop because He didn't stop Christ from suffering and dying for me.

Wow God, you inspire me so much!! I love you!!

Our God is exalted on His throne
High above the heavens
Forever He's worthy...

Say what God?

AHHHHHHHH!!!!! THERE'S SO MUCH GOING ON! Ok this past week has just been so full of emotional ups and downs that I am just tired. Part of me having this blog is that I get to vent about the stuff that's upsetting me.
I've really been feeling a lot of love from people around me lately and it's awesome. These are people who are just willing to love me and I am extremely grateful for that. God has been really blessing me a lot lately.
He was spoiling me really. And then he said no to a prayer, a HUGE prayer.
Wow. I was not expecting that. I legit did not see that one coming. God likes to spoil me so he usually answers my prayers with a "yes" but not this time and although I was extremely upset at the time I wasn't upset with God. I was upset at the situation and the events but my heart never got angry at him. I don't understand Him and I prayed and told him "this sucks" but I never blamed him and even when I think about my reaction I smile for no reason. Want to know why?? Because I would have NEVER done what I did today 2 years ago when I was a non-christian. Because today I truly realized the meaning of my transformation. You see things didn't turn out the way I had planned them today but God told me "DO NOT be anxious", he told me to follow him, yeah it was not easy, it was hard receiving a "no" from God when I usually get an approval for everything but I want to trust him, I'm going to trust him! Wow today I was able to obey God's will and follow His plan...had this happened two years ago I probably would have ignored God completely and done things my way. He is testing me, testing to see if I can walk the walk. It's one thing to say "I'm going to follow you" than to actually do it. I know that he's making me the person He wants me to be, he's preparing me for the future.
Today I had an amazing worship time just by myself in my living room and I was blasting my music and screaming my heart out and wow...I felt the Spirit SOOOOO MUCH!! Like there were times where I would get goose bumps and I knew that He was there and I knew God was in control.
I know that doing the right thing is hard and sometimes we don't even see how following the rules is worth it but think about it, we complain about the world and people who don't follow the rules...well when God tells us to go right we choose to go left!! Not all the time, but sometimes we just ignore him COMPLETELY and we ignore his will. I don't know how to explain it but even though I was sad and disappointed and angry I felt happy and peaceful (Philippians 4:7) and I felt JOY!
My attitude determines my situation. Now, I can choose to be a bratty 5 year old and pout about not being able to get things my way and be a total jerk to the people that brought about this situation OR I can act like a mature young lady and a faithful christian and realize that what I am facing right now is a spiritual battle and I can choose to stay focused on the events of today or I can move on and rejoice because I know God knows better, he planned this whole thing FOR A REASON!! I can choose to confront things with anger and sadness or I can choose to look for the joy in the little blessings of everyday life and confront this with love.
Some good will come out of this, because problems and trials and tribulations are cowards and they don't come by themselves, they come with a solution and lesson. And I know that the testing of my faith develops perseverance :)
My God's enough for me, I hope he's enough for you too :)

Did you know you are not alone??

I want to dedicate this to you. If you are dealing with a certain kind of temptation or sin in your life then this is for you my dear friend. So here it goes....

My dear friend, I want you to know that I love you and I have faith in you. I know it's hard, I know how good it feels to do what's wrong, but I also know how much satisfaction you get when you do what's right. I know that that sin is pulling you and it's luring you and tempting you, but I also know you are stronger than what you think you are but I need YOU to know that. I need you to have faith in yourself just like I have faith in you. Don't you dare give in to temptation, don't you dare ignore what your heart tells you. Your mind betrays you my friend, your feelings don't.

I want you to know you are not alone. I'm a sinner too. My sin bears a different face then yours but it's sin nonetheless. In order to encourage you I have to stay strong myself, I have to know my demons and how to defeat them. YOU are my inspiration for staying strong and Christ is my reason for winning this war. I will not let my sin consume me because I want you to know that yes, you can do it. It is possible. I am a helpless girl but a strong warrior because my strength is never ending (Philippians 4:13)

Please, if you are a non believer take my strength, borrow it from me because I love you and I know you don't belong in that world of sin and darkness. The light is shining on you and you will reach for it someday.

If you are a believer then know that Christ is with you!! I am with you!! Borrow his strength and cling on to what is good. Cling on to God! I refuse to sugar coat anything for you because you know better than this, you have an armor (Ephesians 6) and you better wear it. Be ready for this war and be ready to win it because no matter what the world tells you and what temptation you are facing, you are a light that was meant to shine as radiant as the sun and as beautiful as the moon at night.

I know it's hard, who said it was easy?? Know this, it will be hard, but it will be worth it. The best things in life are those that we fight for. Humans have fought for life, for freedom, for love, for respect, for territory. Now fight for yourself, fight for your life to be the way God wants it to be, fight for your freedom from this temptation, fight for the love that you feel for yourself and for the love that you feel for your family, friends and the love of your life, fight for respect for yourself because this sin is mocking you and taunting you and it's disrespecting the beloved child of God you were meant to be, fight for your territory because it wants to take over your heart and defile it and your heart doesn't belong to temptation.

I LOVE YOU!! I know you can do this, I know you can and I pray that you gather the strength necessary to win this war. My God is always with you and his spirit is here to save you from falling. Take his hand and if you can't, then take my love, I know how hard it is. With God's help, I win battles against my temptations every day, I dare you to join me in my quest for victory :) You are amazing!

Picking up the pieces

Oh man I haven't blogged in like a month. I kinda miss it! Which is why I decided to blog today, I just don't know what to blog about. Well I guess I could blog about relationships since it has been kind of a recurring theme in my life lately. I don't mean just romantic relationships I mean all kind of relationships.

Friendships
Ok I've been stupid lately, I've met so many new and amazing friends that I've kind of forgotten about some of my old friends. I usually hang out with my church friends a lot and they make me extremely happy, but I forget that I have school friends who love me and who need me. One of my best friends confronted me about this not too long ago and it helped open my eyes about the way I was acting, she felt completely abandoned by me and I felt like a jerk because she was right. I never meant to hurt her but I was just caught up in my recent blessings. I want to show God's love to everyone and specially my unsaved friends, I needed to wake up and realize that I am divided into many different little groups of friends and they all need me in one way or another. I am so blessed to have so many loving friends in my life!! Don't be stupid like me, don't forget about certain friends just because there are others coming into your life. If there are friendships that you are willing to fight for and that can be fixed, fix them. As for me I am trying to shuffle all of my friendships and although it gets a little difficult at times, these are kids that are worth it :) Thank you God for blessing me with so many loving people.

Family
Oh yes.....family. Can you believe that it's harder for me to love my family than to love my friends?? I don't get it, I don't know what it is but it has been that way for a couple of years now. For a little background on my family, my parents are divorced and I live with 3 of my 4 siblings. Now something that I have been working on lately is sibling bonding and obedience. I've been trying to show my mom how much I love her by including her into my life a little bit more and by doing random nice things for her. Now I don't know if you have an awesome mom like mine or if you have a mom who's not so great but who said that to show love you have to be loved back?? I mean look at Christ!! Dude couldn't be more hated by all of us and he still died on that cross because he LOVED US!! John 3:16 clearly says "For God so LOVED the world....." Who cares if my family shows me the same love that I show them, the point is that I am showing it and by doing so I shine God's light (Matthew 5:16). Look it's not easy, it's not easy trying to bond with my siblings because I know how much of a jerk I was before I got saved, I'm trying to pick up the pieces of relationships that have been broken and that can be better if I just try a little. I'm not saying they are willing to put in the same effort, but without knowing it someday they will start acting just like me, at least that's what I hope for. I don't know why I find it so hard to love my family but I know that I am willing to try because these are the people that God chose for me and he knows what he's doing, he knows they need me and I need them. So do me a favor will you? Whether they "deserve" it or not, please do a random act of love for someone in your family today, you never know what could come out of that :)

Crushes, boyfriends and any other shenanigans
Haha. I got a little creative with that title :) Well if you are wondering, no, I do not have a boyfriend, but I do have a crush, a wonderful boy who is passionate for God and has become one of my absolute best friends. My favorite part about me and him is the fact that we can get together and talk for hours and hours without having "awkward" moments. Of course I worry and wonder about the "what ifs??", "what if he doesn't want to talk to me? what if Im bothering him? what if he doesn't miss me? I wonder if I crossed his mind" and yada yada yada, all that stuff that goes through a girl's head. Ok let me say that I am a teenager and I much as I would want to not think about that stuff....I CAN'T HELP IT!! lol. Do you ever watch a movie that you've already seen before and then there's a part coming up that you don't like or makes you cringe and you almost want to skip it but you can't cause you happen to be watching the movie with your friends and they really like that part? Well that's how I feel right now. haha. I wish I could skip this whole "having feelings for someone" thing and move on with my life but I can't. If you have a crush or a boyfriend and you are feeling a little like me....STOP! Take a breather and relax. Step back for a second, no matter how things are going with your crush be faithful, the only thing we will never run out of is hope. Stay calm, don't chase after a boy, chase after something that matters. Idk about you but I gave my heart to Christ, he's keeping it safe for my husband and God knows why he allowed these feelings to happen. Ok this boy is amazing, yeah he makes me mad sometimes and sometimes without realizing it he hurts me but I can't explain what I feel for him. So what if he does or doesn't have feelings for me? We have a wonderful friendship and that's what matters, the day that ends that's when my heart will be crushed! If you like someone WHO'S WORTH HAVING YOU BY HIS/HER SIDE then pursue a FRIENDSHIP! Don't go after someone's heart, go after the brightness they can bring into your life. Chase the light.

God
Ahh yes, I finally got to my favorite one. Before I begin....Heavenly Father, thank you for a new day, Holy Spirit please guide my thoughts and type these words for me. Amen. Ok we are all good now. Yep, I have to do this, why? Because out of every relationship in my life this one matters to me the most. I've been a christian for like a year and a half and my transformation has been AMAZING!! God went from being like a "whatever" thing in my life to being my EVERYTHING! Look if you are not saved then this message is for you: He loves you, he truly does love you, he loves you more than anyone else in this world, he loves you to the moon and back and three times as much as that, he loves you so much that he took the time to create a whole life story for you and to create trials so that you could learn from them to create good times so that you could laugh and have fun and joy. He loves you so much that he forgave you and gave you life through Christ, but it is YOUR choice! Heck Im almost 18, after that my parents can't tell me what to do anymore, God can't force you to love him, that's a choice only YOU can make! You can listen to the lies the world tells you or you can search within your heart for the truth!! God said "let there be light", I promise you that the light inside of you will let you know that he is real and that Christ is real and I dare you to look for it. I dare you to look into the mirror and tell me that your life without God is better than my life with him, go ahead try it....I tried it and I failed. You are his beautiful, beloved child :) If you are saved then I am so happy for you my dear brother or sister. I am so happy because like me you were lucky enough to hear the gospel from someone who loves you, someone who cares about you so much that they wanted to see you in heaven but now I want to challenge you and encourage you to be that person for someone else. Don't you dare shut up about the gospel (Romans 1:16), don't you dare conform to this world (Romans 12:2), if you do that the devil wins, if you do that you give him a victory in a battle from a war that he is sure to loose. Look guys, God is my everything because I know that Christ is REAL! I love him because he opened my eyes to what my life can be like if I let him lead me, I love him because he died on the cross so that I don't have to suffer eternally, I love him because every time I look to the sky and smile I know he's looking back and smiling as well, I love him because he picked up the pieces of the selfish, bitter, lying and ungrateful human being that I was and put them together, not only did he put them together but he also polished them, he told me that I was more than that, I was made for more than that.

Let me put it this way: you and I, we are nothing more than just filthy rags but some people think that those rags are just not filthy enough and so they cover them in mud, and when I say cover I mean completely cover them with mud (lies, hurt, betrayal, mean words, mean actions, profanity, etc). We are now covered in all this mud and we feel even more filthy than before. The good thing about that is that Christ is the only person who knows how to wash away all that mud and make those rags all better again :) I'm not telling you accepting salvation will be easy because I don't know that for sure but I am telling you to give it a try because all that mud surrounding you right now, you won't be able to get over that on your own. Trust me, I tried and failed.

Wow.....Ok that was a lot. A little bit of a rant too, well I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did :)

We are useful in our uselessness :)

Ok listen up, this is something that has been on my heart lately and I just HAVE to blog about it. Let's start with the beginning, I am NOT in the very least talented. I don't do sports, I can't sing, I can't draw to save my life, I'm a semi ok dancer, don't even get me started on writing (and this doesn't count, this is just mindless ranting), I am just naturally not good at anything. You know how there's people that are just naturally awesome at everything? Or those people that are really good with one thing in specific?? Like swimming, or singing, or whatever. Ok well I am not one of those people. I was thinking this week how useless I am, I mean compared to the great friends around me I am just dust, honestly. I kind of analyze all the things that my closest friends are good at and man they are so useful!! I can so see how God is using their abilities to take them to far places. See guys, these kids that I hang our with, they are really great and talented kids, whether its music or sports or theater they are just naturally good. So I wondered, what about me? Why am I so useless and talentless??

Then I discovered that there is one thing I'm good at and ts the only thing that I care about being good at.

Being a christian.

WHAAAAAAAT?! Mind blown!! Ok allow me to explain. Look, I am completely useless in the terms that this world defines as useless, but I am extremely useful if we use heavenly terms. Being a christian is the only thing I'm really good at and it's the only thing I care about excelling in. I will make sure that no one worships better than me, no one loves God more than me, no one reads and follows scripture more than me. Now I know this probably can't happen because I'm not perfect but the good thing is that I am useless and in my uselessness I am useful to God to show the world that his love is more important than anything else. That a life with Christ is worth more than any great thing you can imagine. And just because it can't happen doesn't mean that I won't try! I will try because my love for God tells me that I need to try. Yes I do have a talent! My talent is being a christian, it is God given and it is by grace. To this world I am useless because I don't do all the "amazing" things that other kids can do but to heaven I am useful because I can express my love for Christ by understanding and accepting that my uselessness is not bad :) I rejoice in the fact that I can't do anything right because it reminds me that I don't belong in this world, that my soul belongs in heaven and will get there someday.

Ok but what about you really talented people? Does my little rant mean that you are not useful? Not at all!! You excel in either one thing or in everything you do but there is one little thing in which you will be useless or you will fail and even then you are useful to God somehow, it is for him to decide how he will use you.

If you are non believer then I am praying for you but this applies to you too, you may feel like you are completely useless and have no talents, well guess what? YOU'RE WRONG!! Because whether or not you like it or you see it God is using you. God uses non believers to show me that I am not done, that my work here is not done, so there you go, in your uselessness you are useful :)

I am a useless human with a faithful heart and a spiritually talented christian.

Don't ever think that being useless is a bad thing, if you ever feel useless remember that even king David felt useless at one point. You do have a talent, it takes a while to find it but you have one. Search for it, don't sit there and wait for it to magically show up, search your heart!! My dear, you have no idea what you are capable of.

Greg and Alexis

Ok I have to dedicate a blog post to two inspiring guys that I met a little while ago.

About a month ago I was over at my friend's house and I was taking the bust back home. I noticed a homeless man at my stop. He was getting ready to go into traffic because there was a red light (he was trying to collect change from drivers), I was looking at him and he looked at me and I smiled, he smiled back and started walking, as he was walking I said "God bless you!" and he kept smiling. A woman at the bus stop started talking to me about being kind and the importance of kindness and it was nice. The man came back and started conversation with me, he told me his name was Greg and then he asked me if I went to church, where did I go to church, if I had a strong faith, questions like those. We had a wonderful conversation about God. He told me he lived on a tent in the park, he showered every 2 days by the park right across the street and he got food from the church that he goes to. I had a wonderful time talking to him but my favorite part of the conversation was when he turned to me with tears in his eyes and said "this world is nothing! Do you know why we have to suffer? It is because Christ suffered for us on that cross." Holy cow that spoke to me SO MUCH!!! This man who has nothing compared to me was telling me that his sufferings are nothing compared to what Christ suffered, do you know how inspiring that is? (If you have no idea how much Christ suffered on the cross than I suggest you find a bible and read how they describe it in the gospels, that or watch The Passion of the Christ, believer or non-believer I assure you, you will cry.) He told me several times to not conform to the world, this world is nothing compared to life with God, IT WAS AMAZING!!!!! A middle aged homeless man cried in front of me and these were not tears of sadness, these were tears of gratitude. I cannot describe how I felt at that moment.
BUT!
That's not the only friend I made that day. So my bus came and went, whatever, I was doing more important things at the moment, getting home on time could wait. As I was talking to Greg, another friend of his came up to him, his name was Alexis, he was a little younger but also very faithful. We spoke some more about God and about his greatness and we talked about the bible and our favorite books in the bible. Here I was standing with two men who have less material things than me but their faith was amazing, they loved God so much!! That's exactly how I want to be, whether I live in a mansion or in a tent in a park, the one thing that can only change for the better is my love for Christ, my love for God!!
You think your life is hard? Really? My dear, try carrying a cross for miles and miles, try being beaten and humiliated for hours, try having your best friend deny you, try having your father turn his face from you because you are so filthy with sin, sin that you never committed. If the God of all had to suffer, who do you think you are not to? SUFFERING IS NOT BAD!! The testing of your faith develops perseverance and if you have no faith I believe that suffering brings faith.
I want you to listen to this song because it is amazing and it makes me think of Greg and Alexis, my homeless friends from whom I learned that no matter where I go in life, God is better than any blessing and any obstacle. Thank you Greg and Alexis, thank you for your unfailing faith. I wish the whole world could meet these guys.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOOFAaUGfRE

Because it's mother's day

Yes. I had to. I just had to.
It's INCREDIBLE the amount of work that mothers do for us. Holy cow, I mean starting with the 9 months that they have to put up with us kicking them and making them sick and hormonal. haha. I don't think that as children we truly know how much our moms sacrifice for us and how much they love us. From my persona experience, it took me a couple of years to really appreciate my mom.
I have been extremely blessed because I have an AMAZING mother. Honestly, I have no idea where I would be without my mom. I see her as one of the strongest people I know because she has had a difficult life, my mom has lived in extreme poverty and has struggled with people putting her down her whole life and yet she's still standing. She has done everything possible to be a good mother, she will stop buying stuff for herself just to get us what we need, and when I mean "stuff" I don't mean "extra stuff", I mean essential things that any human being needs. My mother was born to be a mother because it's the thing that she does best, my mom has worked in many other things but being a mom is what makes her the happiest. Now I'm not saying she's the perfect mother because she's not, she has made mistakes just like any other mom out there, but she tries. She tries so hard to be the best she can be and give us the best and that's what matters to me. I don't count her mistakes, how can I? Was I made to judge my parents?? No. I was made to love them and respect them and on a day like today I want to honor my mother.
But...
This is NOT only for my mother. This is for every mother out there. Whether your mom is alive or has passed away take this day to celebrate and honor your mom. Really think about everything that your mom has done for you and do at least one nice thing for your mom.
I know my mom is great and I am blessed but I also know not everyone has great mothers. If your mom is not the greatest mom out there or she left you or she doesn't agree with you on a lot of things, then be thankful. Be thankful for all their flaws because that pain they cause you is the most useless suffering you will ever feel. No mother in her right mind means to hurt her children, her love for you is unconditional! Just because someone doesn't know how to love it doesn't mean they don't posses that feeling. Heck yeah it hurts, but you have a choice, you either sit there and judge your mother and let the pain consume you, or you can be the better person and love her even it she doesn't reciprocate.
And if you are a mom reading this, congratulations. You have no idea how important your role is in this world. Don't EVER feel like you are not appreciated or loved because it's a lie. No matter how bratty your kids are they do love you. They do!! And you might not get paid for what you do but love is the best payment anyone can get.
Have a wonderful mother's day! God bless you!!!!!!!!